31 Nights of Pooping My Pants

Every October, as the leaves fall and the nights grow colder, a sinister tradition unfurls in our household. With a penchant for the petrifying, we embark on a frightful journey — a horror movie marathon that lasts the entire month. Each night as darkness descends, I’ll delve into a new realm of terror, rating the horrifying adventures from the slightly spooky to the utterly unnerving. Welcome to the 31 Nights of Pooping My Pants where nightmares come to play, the bowels release and sleep is for the weak.

October Frights

The marathon kicks off with “The Nun” on the 1st of October. Nothing like a little unholy terror to welcome the autumn chill. As I sit down with a bowl of popcorn and a beverage (alcohol of course), the spirits from the screen seem almost eager to share it. The next two nights are dedicated to “Annabelle: Creation” and “Annabelle”, because who doesn’t love a doll with a demonic disposition? Following the possessed puppetry, “The Conjuring” series will continue to haunt the subsequent nights. Clearly, I have a taste for the Warrens’ eerie escapades.

As we trot into the haunted homestead, from October 9th through 18th, the “Haunting of Hill House” series takes center stage. The creepy corridors and ghastly ghosts ensure that my heartbeat matches the ominous ticking of the Hill House’s ancient clocks. No rest for the wicked, as they say. The eerie expedition continues with “Haunting of Bly Manor” series from October 19th to 27th. I now find myself entwined in yet another hauntingly beautiful narrative, filled with long-dead lovers and eerie estates.

The sinister cinema continues with “No One Will Save You” on the 28th, a new title but an old promise of spine-chilling terror (aliens breaking into your home? Fitting). Following this, “Stephen King’s Rose Red” graces the screen on the 29th, offering a maze of macabre mysteries. Just when things are getting too terrifying, “Hocus Pocus” on the 30th offers a comedic, albeit witchy, respite. But fear not, the terror train is back on track with “Hocus Pocus 2” on Halloween night (ha jk not scary), capping off the month-long marathon with a blend of humor and horror.

But wait! There’s more!

Although these films and series from the sinister skeleton of my October scare-a-thon, other ghastly shows and creepy cinematic delights will be peppered throughout the month to keep the blood-curdling. The tradition is a haunting mix of horror, humor, and a dash of poopy underwear, all wrapped up in a cobweb-covered package. As the credits roll on the last night, with a twisted smile, I bid adieu to the demons, ghosts, and the gory, already plotting the terror that next October will unfurl.