Are You In Need Of A Smile?

Entertainment
Sarge

I see that you are indeed in need of a smile! Good. I’m here to help turn that frown upside down with an old pic from my phone. I completely forgot about this masterpiece and it has me thinking… I’ve got a lot of questions.

Behold!

Talk about a shitty situation

Hypothetical poop emergency

What would you do if you had a poop emergency on the highway? Would you just shit your pants? Or pull off at a busy exit and shit on the side of the road? Well for this gentlemen, he chose that latter. A former coworker of mine was willing to break the law and snap this all-time photo. I couldn’t believe she was able to get a picture. As someone who has shat their pants a disturbing amount of times, I personally would have just accepted that I wasn’t going to make it to a bathroom and filled my trousers. I mean at least no one would see or even know if you were in your vehicle. I will say the clean up would be problematic.    

For him, there was no less than 50 witnesses. I’m sure this wasn’t the only photo evidence of said poop emergency. Pulling an act of this nature requires MASSIVE BALLS to put on a show for the world to see. What’s funny is that there’s literally a gas station about 2 blocks down the road. However, I completely understand where he’s coming from. It always seems like in these circumstances we tend to always make the wrong decision. Must have been a dire situation to say the least. 

The scene of the crime

Google Earth can be a useful tool for a lot of things. In this case, I’d like to show you the exact spot where this man squeezed out a fudge monkey. 

Side by side
That pond is green because of this man’s poop

Part of me wants to revisit this crime scene to see if anything special has grown. Is it more grass? Is there a dead spot now? Will there be a new bed of flowers? What if that’s now a designated dookie zone?

I’ve also been wondering… did he even wipe? If he did, what did he use? If he didn’t, what did he do next? How long did he have mud butt? Did he go to work after? What did he eat the night before? Has he done this before? Did he tell any of his friends? Will he see this blog?

All valid questions in my eyes. The truth may never come out, but all I know is that this man made me smile and I just wanted to share that with you today. 🙂