Best Bottles To Buy (Without Breaking The Bank..) 

Booze Everything Else Power Rankings

First things first, this is not top 10 bottles to buy based on taste. So for all you Clase Azul people this probably wont “ring” a good bell for you… This is for the 97% of people who walk into a liquor store looking for a nice bottle without breaking the bank. 

#10 DonJulio 

Starting off at #10 we got the man himself.. DonJulio. You can’t go wrong showing up to a party with a bottle of tequila. There’s also no reason to pay a shit ton when you’re going to be making the same disgusting face after every shot. DonJulio always makes sure you have a great night, but tequila in general is setting yourself up to a night you well may not remember. 

Don Julio Tequila Blanco - Blackwell's Wines & Spirits

#9 Red Wine 

This is a great grab if you ever have a date.. Or just to pass around at a party. Everyone acts like they hate wine till you show up and it’s going around the entire circle till it’s gone. Buy a bag and play slap the bag or just pour one out in a cup. No one will ever know you found it for 5.99 on the clearance rack or some Two Buck Chuck. Realistically most people can’t tell the difference between a $12 bottle of wine and a $40 bottle, and your friends are lying if they say they can. An uncommonly played move is sometimes the best move to make ladies and gentlemen. 

Discover All the Different Types of Red Wine

#8 Jameson 

Whiskey… I don’t think Frankie was talking about Jameson when he wrote the song “Sunshine & Whiskey”. Who knows maybe he was I think its pretty good. It really is good and if you drink it enough it will put some good hair on your chest. 

Jameson Irish Whiskey | Total Wine & More

#7 Smirnoff Raspberry

This is the straight definition of a cheap bottle. Yet I have walked out of a liquor store way to many times with this in my hand. If you’re like me and love taking shots before the big event, this is a perfect bottle for you. Don’t really prefer shots? The Raspberry mixes good at anytime of the day. It’s a great choice to save some $$$, and not feel disgusted with every drink you take.

Smirnoff Raspberry - 1.75L - World Wine Liquors

#6 Titos 

I think everyone has tried some Titos before. It’s not cheap vodka but also not expensive right in that middle range where everyone can afford. Tito’s is great for Bloody Marys and your typical Vodka + X drinks. My only recommendation is to remember that vodka smacks you outta nowhere, especially Titos… if it starts to taste like water, drink some water. 

Tito's Handmade Vodka 1.75L Bottles - Argonaut Wine & Liquor

#5 Captain Morgan

They got a little Captain in them.. Do you got a little Captain in you? Great Bottle to buy, nothing better than a good rum and coke and Captain delivers that great. Sometimes, when I’m drinking one I find it hard to believe I refused to drink it for so many years… Then I remember I almost had to get my stomach pumped when I drank to much of it my freshman year of high school. In my defense, it was one of my first times ever drinking alcohol so I didn’t know I was a lightweight. I would say its the best choice for Rum with the price involved. 

Captain Morgan- Rum Bottle

#4 Kirkland Vodka (Costco)

If you wanna talk about the steal of the century look no farther then “Kirkland Vodka”. Paying $13.99 for a HANDLE of Vodka from America, or you can pay $17.99 and get the bottle imported from France… STEAL.

I have heard many parents compare this to Grey Goose which I think is a stretch but it is actually good vodka. I think it’s just as good as any other straight flavored vodka. The Kirkland Vodka may only be available at Costco but you don’t need a membership to buy alcohol there! How’s that for a fun life hack? Find your nearest Costco and buy your alcohol while also saving you some $$$.

Costco- Kirkland Brand Vodka Bottles

#3 Fireball 

Get your flamethrower ready because you are going to be spitting some Eminem lyrics after you drink some Fireball. The way I would describe it is it burns so good. The biggest key is you get it super chilled in a freezer and it goes down super easy. I went through a huge fireball phase, might’ve burned a hole in my stomach in the process but it was well worth it. Not expensive and a great bottle of alcohol to buy no matter the situation. If you bring it up to a cabin or anywhere you are guaranteed to hear “who brought the fireball”. Everyone loves some good ole flame breath. 

Fireball Bottle

#2 Crown Royal

I finally threw in a bottle that some people might say fall’s on the expensive side. I pay $45 for a 1.75L at Costco. Crown is worth every penny of it, and it’s really not that expensive for some gooooood ass whiskey. Make yourself a Crown 7, sit back and enjoy it with every sip you take. Take a shot of it and feel how smooth it goes down. Just sit and admire the bottle it comes in and put the purple crown bag around it to make sure he stays safe. 

Crown Royal Custom Bags| Crown Royal Bottle

#1 Jägermeister

If you’re reading this article, frantically searching where the Jager could be.. Here it is, and honestly where else did you expect to find it? Buy a bottle of Jager, for one thing and one thing only, JAGER BOMBS. Ever wonder what Jesus handed out at the last supper? Jag and Red Bull. You really think Jesus was having people sip wine the night before he was killed?

Hell no, he was taking Bomb after Bomb with his friends in Jerusalem. Jägermeister didn’t make it to #1 because people made mixies or drank it straight out the bottle (unless you really like black licorice). It’s ranked on top because of the power of the Jager bombs. If you’ve experienced what a bottle of Jag can bring to your life, sincerely, congratulations. If you haven’t experienced it yet, also congratulations because your life will forever be changed after your first Jager bomb. 

Jag Bottle--- Red Bull = JAG BOMBS

Now go forth and drink up. Your wallet and your liver will thank you for getting the booze on this list.