NFL Week 2 gambling guideBuckle up because it’s about to be one hell of a ride. Welcome to week two of the NFL season, My name is Samuel and I’ll be your tour guide through the gambling portion of the NFL season. You may be asking “What makes this hoser qualified to be my tour guide for gambling on Sundays?” My answer to you is I enjoy writing, I love football, and I’m addicted to gambling. So yeah, I am more than qualified.
So hop in and let’s ride. Before each Sunday I’ll give you my pick against the spread and my comfort level for it. My main feature will be the “Plohasz Parlay™”. A parlay of Sunday (and sometimes Monday) games that are always plus money and will win. Last week I went 8-7 against the spread. But one of those seven losses hurt more than most…
So yeah I’m not 100% but last week’s losses are in the past so let’s roll! (Or fade me, totally up to you). Please bet responsibly and if you have an addiction call 1-800 gambler.
Bills -3.5 @ Dolphins +3.5 C
An indivision game, on the road, against a good defense. This is a tough test for a team who just laid a stinker on Sunday. But I think the Bills bounce back and barely cover the spread here.
Bengals +2.5 @ Bears -2.5 CThe Bengals have a couple of really good players but overall are not a good team. Now that can be said about the Bears too but at home, you gotta take Chicago.
Broncos -6 @ Jaguars +6 A
The Broncos have a top-tier defense, the Jaguars have a rookie QB, a bad head coach, and just lost to the Texans… I LOVE the Broncos -6.
Texans +13 @ Browns -13 C
A two-touchdown spread is pretty ridiculous but it makes sense. The Browns are a good football team and the Texans are not.
Raiders +5.5 @ Steelers -5.5 C+
Coming off a short week and overtime and now having to travel cross-country already puts the Raiders at a disadvantage. Now they have to go up against one of the ELITE Defenses in the NFL. I don’t love a 5.5 spread but my money is on Pittsburg.
*I loveeeee Under 47 in this game
Rams -4 @ Colts +4 B+
I think the Colts are a very respectable team. I also think the Rams will go into Lucas Oil Stadium and win by a touchdown or more. Rams -4 all day.
Patriots -6 @ Jets +6 B-
This isn’t the same Patriots we grew up on from the early 2000s through the 2010s. The Jets are not as bad as you think they are. Six points are too high of a spread for the home team here. Jets +6
Saints -3.5 @ Panthers +3.5 A-
I am going to wait to bet on this game until I see if Carolina has that reality Panther thing.
All jokes aside I like the Panthers this year but the Saints should win by a TD or more.
49ers -3 @ Eagles +3 A
Love love love the Niners in this one. San Francisco has a better offense, better defense, and better coaches. Don’t overthink this one.
Falcons +12.5 @ Bucs -12.5 B
Another huge spread and deservingly so. The reigning champs are coming off a long week of preparation and to be honest… the Falcons are just not a very good football team. Now I get if you feel uncomfortable betting a team -12.5 but I don’t envision this one being close at all.
Vikings +3.5 @ Cardinals -3.5 A
Did the oddsmakers watch either of these games last week? Chandler Jones and JJ Watt are going to embarrass the Viking’s o-line. And on the other side of the ball, we have to try and stop Kyler Murray. Maybe If this game was at the bank I’d have a little more faith.
Cowboys +3.5 @ Chargers -3.5 B+
The Cowboys looked very good on the opener but with the news of them losing Gallup and Demarcus Lawerence I gotta go with the Chargers who are a more complete team anyways.
Titans +6 @ Seahawks -6 B-
Seattle Moneyline and Titans spread, hammer it. Every game in Seattle is goofy. Some crazy shit always happens. This should be a fun game to watch and I think the Titans get back on track and play well but not well enough to win in Seattle. Titans cover, Seahawks win.
Chiefs -3.5 @ Ravens +3.5 A-
If Patrick Mahomes, Tyreek Hill, and Travis Kelce are healthy and the line is -3.5 then you ALWAYS take the Chiefs.
Lions +11 @ Packers -11 B
The Packers should make easy work of Detroit here but 11 points is a lot to cover and I think the Lions give us a back door cover.
The Plohasz Parlay
Okay now for the real money maker. The Plohasz Parlay. All moneylines unless noted otherwise, and always plus odds. If someone can point out to me where this loses, please do because I can’t find an L.
With sprinkling in the Packers on Monday Night Football you get +384. You get to triple your money folks.
Plohasz Parlay: 0/1 -1 unit
Having fun: 1-0