KAT Is the Toxic Ex You Can’t Help But Run Back To


We’ve all got that one ex-girlfriend/boyfriend who for whatever reason used to live rent-free (or still does live rent-free) in our heads. You know the relationship was toxic. You know they didn’t treat you well. You know it was never going to work out. But every time you were ready to cut them off, they surprised you with an exciting date, they cooked your favorite meal or they gave some heartfelt apology about how they were going to change. 

That’s Karl Anthony Towns for every single Wolves fan. 

KAT is easily the most scrutinized player the Wolves have ever had in franchise history, and some of those reasons are totally legitimate. He struggles to be consistent and reliable on defense. He is way too emotional when things don’t go his way. And when shots aren’t falling or he picks up early foul calls, he can become a complete mental midget for the rest of the game. 

But faster than you can get frustrated as a fan and start angrily running the NBA Trade Machine, he hits four three-pointers and scores 23 points on 9/12 shooting like he did against the New Orleans Pelicans last night. Just like that, you’re sending a “you up?” text at 1 a.m. cause you just can’t help yourself.

KAT’s Slow Start

Coming into Wednesday’s game against the Pelicans, KAT had only been averaging 16.7 points per game and was shooting 38% from the floor. On Monday against the Celtics, he was defended by 6’ 5” point guard Jrue Holiday and not only got into foul trouble early, but he scored only seven points and committed seven turnovers. 

That’s pretty dogshit. 

And to make matters worse, backup center and Timberwolves legend, Naz Reid, has been BALLING off the bench in pretty limited minutes. I was fully prepared to write an entire blog about why Naz Reid should be playing more minutes than KAT and voice my own frustrations about his start to the year. But like that ex who tells you they’ve changed and that things are going to be different, he absolutely torches the Pelicans and now I’m back on board the KAT train.

It’s Time for Acceptance

KAT is 27 years old and is in his 9th NBA season. For years, Wolves fans have been saying “He just needs to mature, he will figure it out in a couple years.” Well, people, the dude is smack dab in the middle of his prime right now. There is no waiting for him to get older and mature. 

I have been an avid KAT supporter for his entire career because I can’t get over the utter dominance I have watched this guy display on the basketball court, even if it’s not as consistent as most of us want. As I write this, I can confidently say that I accept the good, the bad, and the ugly that he will continue to show us on a nightly basis because I know deep down that this team needs him to compete for an NBA championship. 

Don’t get me wrong, Anthony Edwards is the leader and the soul of this team. But every Batman needs his Robin, and nobody can deny that is Karl Anthony Towns. He is going to pout and complain about every foul called against him. He is going to give super cringy interviews. He’s going to have nights where he forgets what playing defense is completely. But to no avail, KAT will always start raining three balls and dominating in the post just before you can hit send on that nasty X post. 

I’ve reached acceptance and it’s time you all do too.