The 2021 IIHF World Juniors are underway. For the first time
ever in a long time, the Wild have multiple high-level prospects competing in the tournament. Obviously, the major ones like Matt Boldy and Marco Rossi are exciting. But there’s one guy who has been quietly flying up the draft class rankings from people smarter than me (editor’s note: literally anyone, then)
Now, listen. I watch a decent amount of hockey. I also gamble a lot. So when I saw last year that my sports book had odds on the U18 World Juniors, I figured “hell yeah, let’s gamble on hockey teams featuring literal children I know nothing about”. And that’s when I discovered The Piss Missile.
The Piss MissileI knew that Russia tends to have pretty good hockey players, so I put a $5 on Russia to beat whoever they were about to play because they were the next game up. Then I found a super sketchy stream featuring Russian (I assume) commentators who
So I put the game on to see what my bet is looking like. Russia gets up to a 5-3 lead late in the third, so I stop paying super close attention. That’s when I hear the announcers screaming “MOCHA RAKETA, MOCHA RAKETA!!!” And on the replay I see an absolute nuke of a slap shot go into an empty net.I honestly assumed that was the kid’s name, but I didn’t see anyone on the roster named Mocha Raketa. So I go to Google Translate and I type in mocha raketa and sure enough, it comes back as a direct translation of “piss missile”.
Naturally, I have to look up who the announcers are referring to when they talk about a piss missile. That’s when I am introduced to then-16-year-old Marat Khusnutdinov.
Fast forward to today, Khusnutdinov is killing it in the MHL, he is centering the first line of a very good Russian team at the U20 World Juniors, and he’s a future Center for the Minnesota Wild. Khusy (plug: be on the lookout for the Khusy Coozie in the 10K Merch Store in 2022) has all the things Minnesota fans want in their hockey players. a relentless backcheck, great vision, and the ability to do…well, this.
The kid has great vision, knows how the play is going to unfold, and can bury opportunities. Also, CAN YOU SAY CLUTCH GENE?!He’s still only 18 and has a ways to go in his development, but for my money, Marat “Piss Missile” Khusnutdinov is one of the most exciting prospects in the Wild’s farm system and I can’t wait to see him play hockey with fellow Russian, our Soviet Savior Kiril Kaprizov.
Minnesota sports weren’t stressful enough, so I went to Auburn. Diehard everything fan. Will drink beer for money. Deathly allergic to chicken.