Remember When Visanthe Shiancoe Gave Me Nightmares?

Entertainment Everything Else Football NFL Vikings

December 7th, 2008…

The Minnesota Vikings squeaked by the Lions with a 20 – 16 victory. Gus Frerotte (ha) was replaced by Tarvaris Jackson (RIP) after lobbing 2 INTs and getting carted off the field with a back injury. Daunte Culpepper was under center for the Lions and even got his “roll” on with a 70 yard bomb to Megatron. We had this Super Bowl contending roster minus a competent quarterback (just think if Favre got here earlier).

Too bad Kirk wasn’t born earlier (if you want to check out some stats)

In the 4th quarter, TJack tossed an 11 yard pass to… Visanthe, I have a literal KNEE SLAPPER between my legs, Shiancoe. How do I know this? Because I made direct eye contact with that WEAPON of a penis while watching the post game show all those years ago. I know there are many others that have this same exact memory and know just how massive it is.

Now obviously I’m not going to post the actual photo but by doing the simple google search of “visanthe shiancoe locker room” at work you will find it. This might sound weird but it’s must see internet just like this website and all other 10K content.

So after doing the above google search I took a screenshot and went to work on Adobe Express. I tried my best to get the exact right size with the 10K logo…

(There used to be a youtube video of it that got taken down, unfortunate)

Dear God
POV everyone who saw

Jesus fucking Christ.  Now THAT, is an absolute DONGER!  How did he even run?  Did he tape it to his leg?  His poor wife was basically getting fisted every time they had sexy time.  No doubt in my mind she’s got a wheelchair next to the bed.

I wonder if he gets light headed every time he’s erect?  Wouldn’t be surprised if that monster takes a pint of blood. My goodness.  You think he considers it more of a burden than an asset?  Think of how many women were about suffer paralysis and said “nah, I’m out. That thing is just too much for me”.  

Oh, he’s got it like THAT

How would you be embarrassed when you’re packing like that? You know what would be embarrassing? Standing next to him in the shower. It would be just like this.

AUTHOR NOTE: Writing this blog made me feel like Mr. Garrison when he’s trying to write a romance novel but ends up describing penis’ in great detail.