I remember the last bite like it was yesterday. The perfect remains of shredded chicken, sour cream, lava sauce, and a toasted tortilla. It was the summer of 2010. I was in an unfinished basement in the greatest city in the world, Missoula, Montana. I had just finished watching Kobe and the Lakers beat the Celtics in Game 7 and next to me, a Spicy Chicken Crunchwrap.
I had long been a patron of the Taco Bell Corporation, but in 2006 my favorite menu item appeared. For the next four years, I would enjoy hundreds, maybe even close to a thousand Spicy Chicken Crunchwraps. It was always there for me, through the breakups, the high school football losses and most importantly, when for some reason, I had the munchies.
Then poof. Gone. Some say the lava sauce was just too expensive. Others blame the shredded chicken. I blame the Taco Bell Corporation. With all that being said I am launching an all-out social media attack on @tacobell. From this day forward, I will tweet them nonstop until that wonderful handheld gift from the Lord is on the menu again.
Our world needs something that can unite us again, and I strongly believe that is the Spicy Chicken Crunchwrap. Also, if Taco Bell decides to start bringing things back, I’ll take the old restaurant layout.
Enjoy this rare find, a Taco Bell receipt from 1999:
29yo, 2 kids, former place kicker for the worst high school football team in Minnesota history. 2/2 xp, 0/2 field goals, led the state in total punts.