It’s the most wonderful time of the year and you’re never too old to make a Christmas list for yourself or someone special! If you’re looking for some guidance, I have compiled the ultimate list. Be sure to grab a pen and paper as you’re going to want to write this down.
Bob Knight Folding Chairs
36 years after the chair-throwing incident, legendary coach Bob Knight has finally capitalized on his opportunity! Keep an eye out for the “Bob Knight Folding Chair” at your local retail store.
Rex Ryan Foot Massager
Rex Ryan has finally put his foot fetish to good use by creating the “Rex Ryan Foot Massager” exclusively sold at Sharper Image.
Brittney Griner’s THC-Infused Tea
Need to take the edge off a hard day’s work? Brittney and her team of Russian scientists have developed the strongest THC-infused tea on the market. Be sure to pick up all flavors of Brittney Griner’s THC-infused tea at any sketchy smoke shop in your area.
Jason Pierre-Paul Firecrackers
Jason Pierre-Paul Firecrackers are the perfect stocking stuffer if you’re looking to celebrate Christmas with a literal bang!
Antonio Cromartie Condom
Trojan and the father of 14 children teamed up to create the “Antonio Cromartie Condom” just in time for Christmas! Mr. Cromartie sure wishes he would have used his own product in his younger days.
Davante Adams’ Anger Management Course
Christmas can be a stressful time for many but there’s finally a solution to manage your in-law’s pent-up anger with the Davante Adams’ anger management course! Don’t take my word for it, just look at this testimonial from one of his clients.
“The Davante Adams’ anger management course changed my life. I only throw pillows instead of chairs now”
Bob Knight
Rob Kraft Fleshlight
Are you sick and tired of washing your son’s crusty socks and don’t want to confront them? The Robert Kraft fleshlight is the answer you’re looking for! Includes an instructional video for your teen.
Author Note: Shout out to my good friends George and Michael for helping me creating this list!
Lead guitarist of the RockBand band, COViD KiDS |
2 time Diverticulitis haver |
Addicted to snus and “your mom” jokes |
Was told by my gym teacher, Mr. Dewitt, that I wouldn’t amount to anything in life. Suck it Dewitt, I’m a blogger!!