stalocktopus

We’d Like To Propose A Toast to former Wild Goaltender Alex Stalock

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The Stalocktopus is gone. After being placed on waivers yesterday, fan favorite netminder Alex Stalock was scooped up by those goddamn Edmonton Oilers.

The Brick Wall of St. Paul certainly has some memorable moments, on and off the ice. He inspired a religion at UMD. He’s one of the go-to’s for local beat writers and radio hosts.

There’s more than one of these. God bless Stalock.

With his time with the Wild coming to an end, not unlike another Wild great, I wanted to take a moment and go recount some of my absolute favorite bits of the StalockNess Monster.

When He Had Some Words With That Piece Of Shit Corey Perry

God, fuck that guy.

Perry goes about his shit-eating ways and Al was quite simply not having it. For fuck’s sake, how small does your wang have to be to try and start shit with the other team’s goalie when you’re down 6 zip? The video censors some of our South St. Paul boy’s chirps, but you get the gist.

“No, no, no, no…YES!”

Anyone who’s watched more than 3 games with Stalock between the pipes has had that moment. The moment where he leaves the crease to play the puck and there’s a split second where you’re convinced he’s about to fuck up, only to turn around and make it into a great play at the last possible moment. For example, this moment against the Sens.

Underrated elite hockey mind.

Stalocktimus Prime saw the incoming fast break and flips the puck into the bench, which forces a faceoff. He does so in such a way that he avoids a delay of game penalty as well. Zach Parise said it best, “smart, smart play.”

You Always Remember Your First

What a guy.

The Stalocktagon grew up in South St. Paul. He went to UMD. He then gets to play for the Minnesota Wild. Talk about a dream come true. Then, he comes in clutch with a 28 save shutout. You can see the pride and excitement on his face as he talks to Gorg about what it means to get his first shutout for his hometown team, especially against a team like the Leafs. That’s the kind of shit sports are all about. You absolutely love to see that bit.

And Now, A Word From South St. Paul Legend, Producer Cam

Today was a very sad day for me, a fellow South St. Paul alum, as Stalock was claimed by Edmonton. However it is bittersweet, let’s be honest. There just is not room for Al on this roster. Stalock’s injury came at the worst possible time. Kahkonen is playing like he knows he’s the goalie of the future, and unfortunately there’s just no way the Wild could choose Stalock over him. Although I am very sad to see Stalock go, I am stoked for his opportunity in Edmonton!

Stalock in his South St. Paul glory.
Goodbye, sweet prince.